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5 Things You Need To Get Over Already
I get it, I get it, we like to yak. We like to gripe, we like to complain, and we LOVE to air our grievances. Sure, most of the time, there’s stuff to be pissed about: global warming, homophobes, dress codes, TRUMP. But henceforth, I declare an absolute kibosh on complaining about the following 5…
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The First Time A Joke Blew Up In My Face
I live to tell jokes. Always have, always will. Fact: at a party, an acquaintance pulled me aside to tell me he admired my Twitter hashtag. That compliment meant more to me than shaking the school board president’s hand at my High School graduation. Being laughed at – or with – is the highest compliment…
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The Time I Catfished Somebody I Knew IRL
I know we just flipped our calendars over to 2016, but tonight we’re gonna party like it’s 1999! That’s right – we’re going back to the days of dial-up internet! If you had to google either of the phrases “dial-up internet” or “party like it’s 1999,” I’m gonna bet that you weren’t even alive yet…
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2015 Best Nine Instagrams
What the hell is this post, a shameless plug for my Instagram? On the one hand, yes definitely. On the other hand, I’ve felt an Instagram rant has been long overdue from me and I want to get my feelings out there and see what you think. But first, the ‘grams: 1. My top ‘gram…
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Body Acceptance Road Trip
Let’s go on a journey! ROAD TRIP! We’re on our Body Acceptance journey, gurl – just you, and me, the Nagging Little Voice Inside Your Head! And you’re in the driver’s seat – not food, not thinking about food, not wondering how many rice cakes is an ounce. Ugh! Whose idea was it to put…
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Rainy Sunday Morning Update
First off, thanks for all your kind comments, tweets, and (mom) concerned texts about my cold – can’t say I’m 100% yet, but I feel like I’m sloooooowly getting better! Aside from work and doctor’s visits, I’ve been laying pretty low at home, but I had my first social venture of the New Year last…
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Whole New World of Skin Care
It’s all I’ve been talking about and it finally happened! On the last gasp of 2015, I had my long-awaited dermatology consultation! Oh, my dermatologist is the greatest. Dr. McFabulous listened to me, took a look at my scalp, and sent me on my way with three prescriptions: two for my acne (the regimen she…
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Change Inside & Out
Changing the outside doesn’t change the inside. I tell my parents this when they cluck over my tattoos. I want to say, “I’m still your daughter!” Just with more colorful packaging. I remember learning this lesson myself the hard way when I was dealing with disordered eating. If you hate the way you look, and…
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What Was Your Childhood Nickname?
Every adult who was ever a child has a story of how they got a stupid nickname. I wanna hear yours. When I was a teenager, my baby brother (we’re nine years apart!) called me “Castle-head” because I was tall and easy to spot in a crowd. Touchy tall teenagers do not like being called…
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Re-Consider These Jobs for Desperate Unemployed Go-Getters!
You’re driven! You’re talented! You’re a self-motivated, self-described “overachiever”! You’re currently unemployed. You’re still passionate about finding a job where you can put your skills to work, live your best life, create something you can be proud of and be rewarded for your attention to detail and zeal for perfection! But you’re getting a little…
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What Are You Afraid Of???
Irrational fears: everyone’s got ’em. When I give ghost tours, I talk about hauntings and serial killers and people love it but heaven forbid a rat runs by, and they lose their shit!!! Rats are just squirrels with bad haircuts! Rats are a totally irrational fear – leave them alone, and they won’t bother you!…
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Let’s Talk About Periods, Okay?
Halloween is just around the corner, and everyone is abuzz talking about horror movies, so why not talk about my favourite horror of all time? Yes, I just equated periods to horror movies. They are kind of the same, aren’t they? You like the idea of them, but still get grossed out by all the…
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Keepsake
A post-it note. A cork. An empty perfume bottle. Why do I feel the need to keep things? Do I keep things just for the sake of keeping things? The trend lately is on simplifying. Cleaning out, decluttering, weeding through your personal items to claim only the most necessary to keep. Marie Kondo, and other…
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Had A Dream About You, Baby
Yeah, this post steals it’s title from a Bob Dylan song, but no, it’s not about Bob Dylan, but it is about something that makes my skin crawl. The other night I had a dream that I had a baby. Don’t worry, I’m not about to describe some horrible gory nightmare birth, this isn’t the…
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My Turn-Ons Include…
So the BIG NEWS this week is that Playboy won’t be printing images of naked women in their magazine anymore!! I’ll give you a minute to digest that news (and to read the article behind the link) because I know that it is JUST SO SHOCKING you’ll need a second. Are we all up to…
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Me? Unfriendly?
I did something I never thought I’d do the other day. Something I always said I’d never do*. For the first time, I unfriended someone on Facebook because I was offended. *Let me be clear: this is not the first time I’ve unfriended someone on Facebook, and I’m not against unfriending people who have stalked…
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“That’s All”
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jUs8D-xWUuA] Trying to make people like you is really hard. Trying to be funny, or outgoing, or smart, or whatever, it can be so much work. Trying, trying, always trying to be perfect, and then to be better than perfect, is exhausting. No wonder most days I’d rather keep to myself, phone it in,…
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Greetings and Salutations
The first step to meeting new people is saying hello. This is also the most dangerous step! There are so many ways to greet and be greeted and, if you’re awkward and terrified like me, these are fraught with peril. A simple, “Hello, nice to meet you,” can appear cold and frigid. People often want…
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If I Dated Fozzie Bear…
Today we discuss what would happen if I, hypothetically, dated Fozzie Bear. Why date Fozzie Bear, you ask? Well, Kermit is unavailable, Gonzo is too desperate, Rowlf is clearly married to his career. And Doctor Teeth & Electric Mayhem? I’ve dated enough “musicians” (read: one) to know that’s a bad idea. PROS: He’s a bear! …
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5 Fandom Friday: I Shall Name You…
This was a fun prompt to think about! There are so many awesome names out there that I had a hard time culling the list down to just five! I can’t wait to see everyone else’s answers! I got a little fancy and picked two people-names, an animal name, a wireless network name (the most…