Because you love me, and because you can’t get enough of me, and because you want MORE MORE MORE!!!, here are my collected works from all over the Internet!



This is the fanciest spring picnic that under $20 can buy  So how can you pull together a Pinterest-worthy picnic without blowing out your grocery budget? I sure as hell wanted to know. I hit up my local Key Foods to see what $20 worth of packable snacks would look like, and it was not easy.

9 female tattoo artists talk art, ink, Trump, and Brooklyn  If you, like me, follow tattoo artists on Instagram the way most people follow celebrity pets, you might be interested in learning a little bit more about your friendly neighborhood tattoo artist. I did a little reconnaissance and spoke to nine women who work in studios around Brooklyn about their art, what inspires them, and of course, what they love about our fair borough.

The best gluten-free restaurants & bakeries in Brooklyn  If you’ve been watching The Great British Bake Off on Netflix with a single, silent tear of FOMO rolling down your cheek, you need to get your “soggy bottom” to Charlotte Patisserie in Greenpoint.


OTV Magazine 

Believe It Or Not, *I CAN* Make Fun Of COVFEFE Without Forgetting We Are In Real & Serious Danger  True story: I once dated a guy who later confessed that every Facebook message he ever sent me, he typed out in Microsoft Word first so that he could run spell-check. This 19-year-old kid trying to get laid was more concerned about typos when sexting me through FB Messenger than our current leader is when tweeting.

Grim Family Tales  We’re not trying to do it, I swear! But it always ends in a shocking, untimely death. Or a messy divorce. Or a tragic bankruptcy. Why do we share these miserable stories? Don’t we have anything nice to talk about?

What Makes A New Yorker… A NEW YORKER???  Exclusivity is what makes it cool. And as I am fond of saying, “Rules Make Fun More Fun.” So there has to be a rule, there has to be! There’s gotta be a rule about who can be a New Yorker and who can’t, and once you’re in, you’re IN, baby!

My Boobs & Me: A Tragicomedy  I’d scour the racks for the items with the lowest number/letter combination to sneak off to the dressing room, only to become flustered when I’d find that even the smallest cup size available in stores was cavernous on my meager frame. Let me break this down for those of you who’ve never had this problem with a handy visual: it was like putting a marble in a Big Gulp cup.

Love Languages? Screw It.   Imagine me in a mask and cape, my paramour fainting into my arms. “I noticed we were running low on Pepto Bismol,” I whisper into his swooning ear, snatching ahold of the chandelier above our heads, “so I picked some up at Rite Aid  when it was on saaaaaaaaale!” We swing over the fracas below and out the open window, landing safely on the back of my trusty steed, and gallop off into the moonlight!

Share If You Agree, Ignore If You Agree  Here’s a baby sitting in a pumpkin, sharing graphic photos of animal abuse and screaming at me to share if I agree that animal abuse is WRONG.

My Favorite Towel  It begins six and a half years ago, in Europe. Don’t all great love stories begin on a whirlwind holiday in romantic Europe? Three Coins in a Fountain? La Dolce Vita? Roman Holiday? I was traveling the continent with my first love. My first love was a human boy, just to clarify. But that was mainly because I hadn’t met The Towel yet. Keep up!

Final Debate POTUS 2016 Rocky Horror or American Horror Story: Trump  Chris Wallace once again offered Trump an opportunity to apologize to the nation for the Trump Tapes, and Trump absolutely failed to apologize…. for anything, honestly. He began by emphasizing that he didn’t even feel the need to apologize to his wife, who he then waved to in the crowd (I’m sure Melania was thrilled at being pointed out as the woman who receives no apologies). A not at all recalcitrant Trump went on to deftly change the subject by announcing, “I just want to talk about something else.”

2nd Presidential Debate, or, What Donald Trump Doesn’t Know About Government Could Fill Hillary Clinton’s Resumé  Today we’re recovering from not only the 2nd Presidential Debate, but also Columbus Day, the holiday when we celebrate the arrival of a clueless outsider into an arena where he was unwanted and uninvited, whereupon he set in motion the events that would lead to more than 500 years of suffering and turmoil on this continent.

The 2016 Vice Presidential Debate: There Are No Losers (Except For The Moderator)  Who’s winning this debate? Not Elaine Quijano, that’s for damn sure. She looked as lost as I felt on my first day teaching sixth grade. In her tight-lipped grimace, I could see myself as I was that day, screaming silently into my cheeks “PLEASE JUST STOP TALKING WE HAVE TO GET THROUGH THIS.”

Un-Debatable  (reposted from Femnasty)




❄️SNOWFLAKES!❄️  The irony (cuz you know I love irony) here is that the alt-right decries snowflakes for being offended by things when they, in fact, are offended by things ALL THE TIME. Maybe it’s an issue of magnitude? While the left gets offended by frivolous things like swastikas on public playgrounds and police brutality, the right reserves their outrage for more serious causes like… red coffee cups! Female Ghostbusters! And Nordstrom’s…

“And Sisterhood” Won The Super Bowl!  I lifted up a silent prayer to Bowie in Heaven: “Please let this performance be fabulous AND political AND subversive AND entertaining, in the name of the Queen Bitch amen.”

Alternative Facts  Nazis would be sooo less horrible if they just weren’t called Nazis, right? Right? Ah, now there’s an idea! “Right!” Let’s just put “alt” in front of an acceptable word (RIGHT!) and like magic — POOF! Alt-RIGHT! Much softer and gentler than “Nazis,” tee hee, RIGHT?!

The Season Of The Bitch  …the defeat of arguably the Most Qualified Woman Ever to arguably the Least Qualified Man Ever led us all to double down on Female Anger.

Pls Don’t Pop My “Liberal Bubble:” The Musical!  NEW YORK CITY (center of the universe) — Yeah, there’s a reason people put up with the bullshit of living in New York, and it’s not because we loooove wondering if the mold problem in our grotesquely unaffordable apartment has gone from a lowercase-p “problem” to a capitol-P “Problem.”

Lick It Up, Baby, Lick It Up  High above the Gotham skyline, a beam of light shines in the air. Someone’s in trouble! Someone needs help! But what’s that? That’s not the Bat Signal I see…it looks like…two fingers…and a tongue…

“The Meek Shall Inherit…” Absolutely Nothing, So Do Something About It  Until 2016, I still believed that the way to get ahead was to keep your head down, not draw attention to yourself, tiptoe around conflict, and not ask for anything in return. Har, har.

Casual Sex, Actually  Having casual sex doesn’t mean you lack respect for yourself any more than eating McDonald’s at 3am means you lack respect for yourself.

We Need To Talk About “Dressing Sexy”  Therefore, “dressing sexy” is really just performing a narrow, arbitrary idea of what people consider “sexy.” You’re putting on a costume that reads “sexy,” just like you’d put on an outfit for an ’80s party, or don a panda suit.

Oh. My. God, Becky…  Her eyes met mine. I panicked. What the hell is wrong with me? Why am I such a bitch? Who taught me to hate other girls like that?

10 Things I Hate About Teen Movies  5. Stigmatizing teen pregnancy. Hey, guess what? Teen mothers are people, too.

Well, Whaddaya Say, Pilgrim?  Maybe, in the spirit of the Pilgrims, we should show up at other people’s homes and drink all of their good wine. When the bewildered homeowners shuffle timidly out of their bedrooms in their pajamas at the sound of an intruder (us), we can shoot at them with muskets. I mean, after all, that’s literally what the Pilgrims did.

Electioneering… And The City  See, there’s this thing called “electioneering,” and it’s prohibited at the polls! Whuuut? Yes, you can’t passively campaign for a specific candidate at the polling place, and in some cases, that can include wearing campaign gear to the polls.

“Live From New York, It’s HELL YES Women Are Funny!”  Kate McKinnon won a damn EMMY, and it’s been statistically shown that 75% of all women in the Ghost-Busting profession get their start on SNL.

Nasty Prez  No, my name ain’t “baby.” It’s HRC. Madame President if you’re nasty.

Hold Up!  Of course. Of. COURSE. Y’all, of COURSE Hillz is a member of the Beyhive. If there’s another woman out there who is 50% of a power couple, and knows what it’s like to be cheated on publicly, but chooses to stay in the marriage and work on things for the sake of her daughter, it’s GODDAMN BEYONCÉ.

The Paris Heist  Oh, bless you Twitter, you tried to treat Kim Kardashian like a human being, but you fell just short of the mark.  Forgive me if you’ve heard this song and dance before, but it’s the old “Madonna/Whore” dichotomy. Women are either sinners, or saints. Once again, we have reduced a famous woman to her vagina. To put it simply, a woman puts a penis in her vagina and she becomes worthless, HOWEVER, she can redeem her humanity by passing a baby through that vagina and becoming a sainted ‘Mother.’ Sounds fair, right?

Un-Debatable  See, Trump became visibly shaken and agitated at the mention of Machado’s name, as if he’d sent some soft-hearted woodsman to take her into the forest and do away with her, like the Evil Queen tried to murder Snow White, and he just found out that she was still alive.

Taking A Stand & Taking A Knee  Black lives matter. If you disagree, you’re saying “Black lives DON’T matter.” That’s how disagreements work. If you pull the “Yes, but…,” you’re derailing.

Damned If You Do, Damned If You Don’t  OH MY GAWD. That bitch. I mean, President is the highest office in the land, can we really trust it to someone who might get pneumonia? We should really elect someone who could never possibly get pneumonia, you guys, because it’s a matter of national security.

“No” Means…  I’m sure you are aware by now of the killing of Tiarah Poyau, the latest in a long, long, too long line of women to be slain for rejecting a strange man’s sexual advances.

Gender-Swapping Is The New Black  “Why is it so hard to write a female character who isn’t obsessed with going shopping, getting married, and having babies?” we screamed. Time and time again, we’d get close, then we’d get let down. Tess needs her boyfriend to bail her out in Working Girl because she’s too flustered to explain herself to the big boss. I MEAN REALLY.

His Level  She’s right, you know. The statue didn’t make us laugh at Trump’s bloviating tweets, taco bowls, or inability to speak intelligently and coherently on any topic. It didn’t make us think about his lack of qualifications for the highest office in the nation, his unethical business practices which cheated vendors for his casinos out of their livelihood, or his complete clusterfuck misunderstanding of foreign policy. It was a fat joke. A fat joke, and a tiny penis joke.

Burkini Beach Bingo!  Your friendly neighborhood mansplainer is quick to point out that the burqa oppresses women. Ironic, because the thing that actually oppresses women is taking away their choices. Like, say, banning their bathing suit of choice? “I support women’s freedoms! By telling them what to do.”

2016: The Summer of Sexism  Bold statement! Why is 2016 the Summer of Sexism? Depending on who you ask, it could be that this was the summer when women forgot their place.

Speech  YES, free speech is an American institution. But Twitter =/= the Constitution. Private corporations can make their own rules. How can I explain this better…? Yes, the Declaration of Independence guarantees the right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness, but if your “pursuit of happiness” means squatting down and dropping a deuce in the Hot Wheels aisle of Target, you can’t be surprised when the security guard tosses you out into the parking lot with your pants around your ankles. Because Target is a private corporation, and they are within their rights to ban openly shitting in the toy department.

This Is News?  Apparently, designers refused to create a dress for a Hollywood star to wear on the red carpet. Ahem. Let me repeat that. Dress designers refused to design a dress. DESIGNERS!  YOU HAD ONE JOB! That job is to design dresses! R U Fckin KIDDING ME?

Ban The “Rape Factory”?  But the most striking thing about Valenti’s article is the fact that it exists at all. When I saw the question “Should we ban frats?” in the headline, I sucked in a deep breath and flinched as I clicked the link, because I — and I think you did, too — knew what the reaction was going to be. I knew that the objections to her concise, logical and well-researched argument were going to reinforce exactly why rape culture still exists: because we don’t really want to change anything.

Golden Day For The Supreme Court  By voting in favor of our health and safety, the Supreme Court is looking out for women like you would look out for a friend. And what do we do when a friend does us a solid?  Thank them, of course.

Can You Hear The Dog Whistle?  “Dog-whistle politics” is the use of a phrase that means one thing to one group, and quite another to another group. At first glance, the word “TERROR” in that headline means “extreme fear,” which, yes, that’s definitely true. However, in post-BUSH II American English, the word “terror” is codified to mean TERRORISM > 9/11 > we’ll put a boot in yer ass, it’s the American way!

Why Men Need To Learn About Periods  UNFAIR! UNFAIR! Why were the boys excused from learning about the workings of the womb? THEY ALL CAME FROM ONE! That’s like your parents telling you they lived in Paris for a few months while you were a baby but never bothered to tell you about it because you wouldn’t remember it anyway. UNFAIR! UNFAIR!

Doin’ It For Yourself  How does society gauge success for women? C’mon, ladies, you know the answer! “HAVING IT ALL!” That means career, friends, good looks, and, most importantly, a ring on that finger!

Choice  It’s every little girl’s dream for when she grows up. I’m talking, of course, about being interviewed by Oprah. “Meghan, you’re so wise,” Oprah would say to me.  “Tell us, what does ‘feminism’ mean to you?” “Well, Oprah,” I would toss my hair and sneak a smile.  “To me, feminism is about CHOICE.”

How To Cope When You Realize You Are Not Actually “Not Like Other Girls”  Maybe in your youth, ‘femininity’ was sold to you like a Ford Model T: it comes in any color you want, as long as that color is PINK.  Maybe an adult chided you for betraying the rigid constraints of your gender by saying something like, “Girls don’t get dirty” or “Good girls mind their parents” to which you applied your childlike logic to construe:  “Well, then, I’m not like other girls!”  That’s fair, because you were only a child, and that adult should have known better.

This Prom Is Bananas, B-A-N-A-N-A-S  Nowadays, there are SO MANY more options for dresses, and this is VERY BAD, because some of those dresses show things like GIRLS’ BODIES *eeeek* and we all know that teenage girls’ bodies drive teenage boys to do HORRIBLE THINGS like…poison the town water supply?  QUESTION: why not just march on J.C. Penney with pitchforks and demand they stop selling such lurid filth to Our Daughters?  No, it’s totally the girls’ fault for not reading your mind and divining what is acceptable and what is not acceptable according to your arbitrary standards of femininity and purity.

Cultural Appropriation: What Is It?  OMG WTF DO U DO IF U R CULTURALLY APPROPRIATING?!? 1. Apologize, 2. Stop. Seriously, just stop.  If you try to defend yourself just so you can go on appropriating whomever, whenever, you’re going to start appropriating Douche Lord culture, and that look is NEVER a good look.

Targeting Bathrooms  …at Target, customers are called guests.  And trans women are women, not men in dresses.  Trans men are men, not women in pants.  It doesn’t take a college degree to understand that.  But I have one!  Yes, and I put myself through college by working at my local Target store!

The Cure For Eating Disorders Is…  Until just a little while ago, James Fridman was just a guy with Photoshop.  Until he stumbled upon the cure for eating disorders…

Reverse Discrimination  So in reaction to actual documented wage disparity, a feminist university group attempted to teach a lesson in discrimination.  The men-folk cried “Reverse Discrimination!”  They then retaliated by threatening rape and violence against the members of the group, which is reverse-reverse discrimination or, in playground parlance, “double dog”discrimination.  Anyone who’s been “double dog” dared to hang upside-down on the monkey bars knows that, once things get to “double dog” level, it is a sign that one’s opponent is a scaredy-cat, and merits the traditional taunting of chicken noises.

Free The Maxi Pads!  No need to bleed during that business meeting, ma’am! Just keep it inside! Then scamper home, squat down in your backyard, and release the torrent of menstrual flow onto the roots of the yucca tree you’ve planted to worship Diana, Goddess of the hunt. Clench the ceremonial rose quartz between your teeth as you bare down and bleed as hard as you can, repeating “Death to the patriarchy” under your breath.

Men vs. Makeup  GoogleFacts tweeted last week that “men like women who wear less makeup.” Many people were very upset by this, but they failed to understand why men like women who wear less makeup. Are you ready? Here are the ten reasons men seem to prefer women who wear less makeup: 1. Man is on the top of the food chain, but there is one rung above: the chainsaw-wielding bear. A woman wearing  lot of makeup could, logically, be a chainsaw-wielding bear in a clever and convincing “woman wearing a lot of makeup” disguise. Fool us once, chainsaw-wielding bear…

All The Small Things  Even as I wailed about what an inconvenience this was going to be, a part of my brain yelled at me for being so upset: “Get over it! Are you serious?! Get a grip! Where are your priorities, lady?!”

4 Women Who Inspire Me 4 Women’s HER-Story Month!  If someone called you a “world-class bog snorkeler,” you’d probably take it as an insult. Unless you’re Julia Galvin, who is an ACTUAL World-Class Bog Snorkeler!

Makin’ Misteaks  If you don’t allow people to learn from their mistakes, you aren’t allowing them the chance to get better. Condemning someone to be punished forever for THAT ONE mistake is throwing away any hope that they can redeem themselves by learning from it.  That’s what we want, right?  People to learn from their mistakes?

Tangled In The World Wide Web  Back in the olden days, the Internet was a simpler place. Oh sure, it tied up your phone line and made the most awful sounds like SCREEEEEE-ERRRRRR WAAAPOOOM WAAAPOOOOM WAAAPOOOOM KKKKKKSKKSKSKSKSKSKSKSKSS but in so many ways, it was a gentler time.

Trust Your Gut!  I spent two hours in the police station, telling and retelling my story. I stuttered out shamefully that I had actually given him my number a year and a half ago. I looked down at the table when cops asked me why I waited so long to report his harassment. I shrugged like a schoolgirl getting a scolding.

Consent: It’s The Word!  Three Universal Rules: don’t get in a car with strangers, don’t go to Whole Foods hungry, and don’t have sex without consent.

Let’s Talk About Sex, Baby!  CLEAN YOUR ROOM. Oh yes. Can’t go to the window, to the wall without tripping over dirty sweaters, books or water bottles? Tidy that up. You don’t think having a clean room matters? You’ve obviously never had a chiffon scarf catch on a tea light and set your IKEA dresser ablaze while hooking up (true story).

Sucky Venn Diagram Of Coworker Friend Crush Suck  Let’s be real: we pop off feelings for our friends because they know us, they care about us, they’ve been with us through everything.

How To Deal With The Worst Breakup Line Ever  File under “Literally the oldest breakup line in the book,” see also synonyms “It’s not you, it’s me” and “You’re really great, can we still be friends?” We’ve all been there, and we’ve all heard it. Even, yes, me!




James Franco’s Undead Take On ‘Mother, May I Sleep With Danger?’ Should Have Stayed Dead: BUST Review  Franco serves up Mother, May I Sleep With Danger? version 2.0 with a twist: the twist being, he’s replaced every element of the original film with cringe-worthy male-gaze lesbian softcore and fangs. Actually, while he was at it, he should have called it Mother, May I Queer Bait? If you’re hoping for lesbian vampires a la The Lost Boys meets But I’m A Cheerleader, you will not enjoy this film. This is Twilight meets Where The Boys Aren’t 5, the shitty “lesbian porn” film for straight men that I paid $1 for at the musty “adult store” off Route 11 during my freshman year of community college.

Tampon Tax, Begone!  Like toilet paper, menstrual items are necessary for living, not “luxury items,” so why TF were they even taxed in the first place? Having a period is already expensive (tampons and bananas and 80 proof whiskey don’t buy themselves HAHA), so the tax was just an added kick in the fallopian tubes.

Am I A Slut? I Took Five ‘Slut Tests’ And Here’s What I Learned About Being A Slut  Sluts: What are they? Who are they? And how do I know if I’m a slut? The world of sluttitude is nuanced, stigmatized, and complicated, BUT if you seek the answer to the latter question, you can trust that the Internet has the answer. Possibly several answers! Just Google “slut test” and you will find several in-depth quizzes that promise to tell you if you are a slut. Sound simple? Well, no…

9 Unique Sangria Recipes: Because Fruit Is Healthy, And Wine Gets You Drunk  Is there anything better than sinking your teeth into a nice, healthy piece of fruit in the very field it was grown in?? Uh, YES THERE IS: You could drown that fruit in a pitcher of wine and pour some sugar over it. That, my friends, is the best way to eat fruit! Get out them big glass pitchers, it’s SANGRIA SEASON!

The Seven Types Of Catcalls (As Explained By Ariel, The Little Mermaid)  Unless you’ve been living “Under the Sea,” you’ve probably been catcalled at some point in your life. Street harassment is an everyday annoyance for women when they’re just living their lives, “strolling along down a — what’s that word again? — STREET!”

12 Extinct 90’s Fashion Trends, In Honor Of The Death Of Aeropostale  A piece of our adolescence has died: popular mall retailer Aeropostale has officially filed for bankruptcy. All across this great nation, “preppies” are sinking to their knees in their relaxed-fit slim khakis and blowing their noses on their long-sleeved polo shirts. Though a Hollister may eventually fill that empty space in the mall between Payless Shoes and Pretzel Time, no one can fill the void in our hearts. But we come to bury Aeropostale, not to praise him! In honor of our departed store, let’s dig up the fossils of yesteryear’s trends and pay homage to the extinct fashion trends of the 90s!

We Need To Have A Potty Talk: What’s The Deal With Bathroom Bills?  …if you’re a cis man whose response to inclusive bathrooms is “can’t wait to put on a dress and go peek under some stalls!” because your twisted brain conflates equal access with sexual assault, then guess what? You are not allowed to use any bathroom (I said so) and you need to hold in your poop until you explode like the human supernova of feces that you are.

The 8 Best Prom Scenes In Popular Culture, No Corsage Or Limo Required  And WHO HIRED “Disaster Movie Voiceover Guy” to do the trailer for this teen sex comedy? “In a world where Janey wears overalls AND glasses, only one man can save her from not being Prom Queen! Zach Siler IS! THAT! MAN! Holy falafel, dude.

‘Pervert Park’ Takes You Inside The Neighborhood That Over 100 Convicted Sex Offenders Call ‘Home’: BUST Review  Frida and Lasse Barkfors’ documentary Pervert Park is an unflinching stroll through a neighborhood most of us would be terrified to call home, but has become a vibrant and supportive community to those who live there.

‘The Witness’ Resurrects Kitty Genovese, The Woman Stabbed To Death In Front Of 38 Witnesses: BUST Review  “38 Watched Murder — And Did Nothing.” That New York Times headline tied Kitty Genovese’s murder up into a neat bow. The Witness gently tugs at the strings of that bow, slowly unravelling a complex web of lies behind the infamous story, and gradually weaving together the truth of Kitty’s life — and death.

This Peruvian-Based Ethical Clothing Brand Is Fighting Fast Fashion: BUST Interview  Their love story is interwoven with their passion to share beautiful handcrafted goods with the world, and their mission to help local artisans earn a living doing what they love.

India’s Rape Epidemic — And What Is Being Done About It  While is is heartening to hear that women’s safety is becoming a primary concern to the Indian government, this response may not be the solution that women have been waiting for.

34 Vintage Ads That Prove The Good Old Days Weren’t So Good  Even today, there are no shortage of ads telling you to get a “beach body.” The beach body: cause for serious concern and careful deliberation since apparently, fucking forever.

This Illustrator Explains To Bros Why They Need Feminism  Rasenth is an illustrator, comic artist, and animator from California, currently living in Japan.  You’ve probably seen some of Razzy’s work on social media already, as these epic illustrated takedowns of sexism have been shared countless times across social media platforms such as Twitter, Facebook, and Pinterest.

We Tried 8 Period Tracking Apps — Here’s How They Held Up  True story: Type in “period tracker” to the App store on your iPhone, and you will get 361 results. YIKES! How do you know which ones are good?  How do you know which one you’ll like?  Well, I picked 8 of the most popular and highest recommended FREE period tracker apps out there and tracked my period, PMS symptoms, and ovulation on all of these apps. Yes, that is a screenshot of my phone. I DON’T MESS AROUND!!!

Our 18 Favorite Dogs On Instagram And Why We Love Them  Tibby is the Kardashian of corgis. Her social media is as on fleek as her butt floof! She knows how to work a hashtag, and her videos are hilarious.

6 Body Positive Illustrators You Need To Know About  For those days then you feel like “ugh,” you need bright, cheerful reminders of how you are just perfect, just the way you are!

‘Critique My Dick Pic’ Is A Body-Positive Approach To Sexting: BUST Interview (NSFW)  In an average week, Madeleine Holden receives upwards of 100-200 dick pics. Which is fantastic, because Maddie is the creator of Critique My Dick Pic, a popular website where she instructs “senders” of all genders how to take thoughtful and artistic erotic photographs!

9 Extreme Hair Trends To Dye For  I’ve been chalking my hair with sidewalk chalk and water since I was 13 years old. I refuse to accept the hair I was born with!  If you’re like me, you’ve known you were destined for hair greatness since you first saw Jewel Staite as Catalina on Space Cases (OMG, SNICK).

16 Nostalgic Hair Accessories From The 90’s And Where Are They Now  If you grew up in the 90’s and early 00’s, you probably spent the majority of your mornings untangling these hair accessories from the wadded-up mess they became in your vanity drawer. Let not nostalgia go gentle into that good night, let’s resurrect them for a roundup and find out where they are now!  Take some Dramamine, because you’re about to ride the Nostalgia roller coaster.

Meet The Cake That Was So Sexy, Instagram Disabled The Account  Brace yourselves, you’re about to witness some too-hot-for-Instagram frosting action! Apparently THIS CAKE looked so much like a tit, it violated Instagram’s terms of use.  THIS CAKE.

15 Photos Of 90’s Teens In Their Natural Habitat — Their Bedrooms  Teenagers of any decade will no doubt relate to the photo series, accompanied by short interviews with the teens themselves in a style reminiscent of the popular photography project Humans of New York. The girls (and boys!) share stories of getting caught with drugs, disappointing their parents, losing their home in a fire, getting pregnant during their first sexual encounter and losing a mother to suicide.

This Tattoo App Lets You Get All Of The Ink With None Of The Pain  This app is so much fun to play around with, it’s just as fun as getting a tattoo, but without the painful parts! I’m referring, of course, to telling your mother.

10 Feminist AF Tank Tops To Hide Under Your Work Clothes  When the clock strikes five and you’re a free woman, you just want to run out into the streets and tear off your stuffy work attire – but wait! You need a feminist AF t-shirt to reveal when you rip open your starched white Ann Taylor blouse!

The Best April Fool’s Pranks On The Internet  It takes a lot to fool me on April Fool’s Day. Maybe that’s because my natural existence is one of skepticism. My spirit animal is a Boston Crème Donut of disbelief, with a light icing of sarcasm and a saccharine cream filling of irony.

The Daily Mail Asks, ‘Should You Shave Your Forearm Hair?’  Not only is shaving all of your body hair off a requirement of being a woman, there are so many benefits! In addition to stripping your body’s natural protective layer of hair away, you’re also exfoliating away dead skin follicles! Who wants to be covered in dead things? Ew, not me! I’m a LADY.

What You Need To Know About The New FDA Label For Mifepristone And Abortion  This was a huge win for reproductive rights — from a federal agency!

Swipe This! This Research Finds The Best Dating App For Long-Term Lovin’  According to Pew Research, 5% of couples – married or otherwise committed – stem from online dating, so I just gotta ask, where are the other 95% meeting each other? In the laundromat? The grocery checkout line? Did your Dalmatians wrap their leashes around your legs and you just went with it? No judgement. Mazel tov!

11 Questionable Lessons From ‘Strangers With Candy,’ In Honor Of Amy Sedaris’ 55th Birthday  Why, it feels like only yesterday she was in high school!  Starring in Strangers with Candy as everyone’s favorite user, boozer and loser Jerri Blank, that is.  Ah, Jerri taught me some valuable lessons in those days…

These New Greeting Cards Offer Support And Encouragement For Women Undergoing Infertility Treatments  Mother’s Day is just ahead, and it can be a time loaded with emotion for those struggling with infertility. Holly Camp, designer and creator of Virginia-based greeting card company Holly Camp Cards, has unveiled a new line of greeting cards for women struggling to conceive.

Things Will Get Cheesy At The Brooklyn Mac & Cheeze Takedown  Your friends called. They said yeah, you make a pretty boss mac ‘n’ cheese. Therefore, you MUST enter the Takedown and test your chops for prizes sponsored by Cuisinart, Anolon, Microplane, and Wusthof. Not to mention the glory! Do it for the glory!

Indian Teen Has To Film Her Own Rape To Convince Her Mother To Believe Her  When her father offered to teach her how to ride his motorcycle, his 14-year-old daughter in Utter Pradesh in Northern India followed him to a nearby field where he raped her. She told her mother about it that very day, but her mother refused to believe her.

12 Giddy Spring Florals That Belie Your Moody, Pessimistic True Nature  In springtime, the insidious sunshine slithers under the skin of even us most devoted cynics. After the clocks turn forward, we are seized by an inexplicable urge to timidly brush aside our blackout curtains, pause listening to Fiona Apple’s Tidal on repeat, and (insert scream) GO OUTSIDE. So you’d go out tonight, but you haven’t got a stitch to wear? No problem! Here are a dozen spring florals that even the moodiest pessimist can pull off!

LUSH Product Sprouts Surprise In Shower Drains  Fee-fi-fo-fum! Some LUSH customers have discovered something surprising cropping up in their drains after using their LUSH Wiccy Magic Muscles Massage Bar in the shower!

British Comedian Goes ‘Undercover’ As A Woman On Tinder To Mansplain Our Struggles To Us  Oh, so he put on a wig for some giggles! He’s a comedian! He’s not trying to walk a mile in our sensible pumps to understand our struggles. He’s trying to figure out why he can’t get a date by going Tootsie on Tinder.

7 St. Patrick’s Day Cocktails To Make At Home, Because You Have To Work Tomorrow  It’s St. Patrick’s Day! A perfect excuse to draw a shamrock on your face with that green eyeliner you only use once a year to…draw a shamrock on your face… and hit the pubs to celebrate! RECORD SCRATCH! It’s Thursday, you have to work tomorrow! Buuuuuttt, nothing’s stopping you from drinking at home! (Shamrock on your cheek optional).

Rock Star, Vampire, Stepdad: What Do You Think Ted Cruz Looks Like?  The jury’s still out as to whether or not Ted Cruz, Republican  — er, second-runner to real-life Oompa Loompa? — is the Zodiac Killer. And he definitely looks like a toddler lying to his parents about flushing his dad’s expensive watch down the toilet just for fun. But is he also in a Christian rock band? This viral Facebook post seems pretty convincing! Hey! Is that Ted Cruz?!

Who Approved These Fat-Shaming Photos For Plus-Sized Clothing?  I was seven years old, the year was 1992, and I’d just read The Babysitter’s Club Super Special #7 Snowbound where Karen Brewer – Kristy’s little sister – invented “sweater pants” and rocked my little second-grade world. Regardless of how cute my lavender unicorn sweater looked on my legs then, as an adult, I wouldn’t buy a sweater online if the model was wearing the sweater on her legs. That’s ridiculous. Also, I was seven years old! At age seven, I fully believed I would grow up to marry one of the New Kids on the Block (call me, Joey). Point is, I grew up, and I learned that there is a time and a place for proper pants wearing. Unlike some people, ahem Wish ahem.



Unpopular Opinion: I Hate The Concept Of ‘Resting Bitch Face’  Quick! Grab your phone, open your camera, and take a picture. Unless your lips are curled in a gentle smile and your eyes twinkle like a Disney princess rolling on molly, you probably have “resting bitch face.” (Disclaimer: only a medical doctor can diagnose resting bitch face.).



Why I’ll Never Shut Up About My Menstrual Cycle  When you talk about your menstrual cycle, what do you say? Do you cringe about the thought of being “on the rag?” Do you drop your voice to a whisper and confess that it’s your “lady time?” Or do you take to Twitter to declare, “it’s Shark Week!” Whatever you do, you’re help breaking down the stigma around menstruation!

Fighting The Monster: Jealousy!   Jealousy sucks, period. So how do we kick the addiction? I like to think of it this way: Happiness is NOT the A train in New York City at rush hour. That means, there’s room for all of us! Er, unlike the A train at rush hour. You see? Her happiness isn’t edging out your happiness, and her success doesn’t doom you to a life of failure.

“You’re Driving Me Crazy:” How Abusers Use Gaslighting Technique To Manipulate Others  Sociopaths and narcissists may gaslight their victims by outright lying about any wrongdoing, denying their transgressions and refusing to own up to their misdeeds while simultaneously convincing their victims that they are trustworthy and know what’s truly best.

Does My Makeup Offend You? Why I Will Still Beat My Face If I Want To: #YESmakeup, #YESfilter  Unless you’ve been living in a cave with surprisingly good wifi all your life, you know that makeup & femininity go hand & hand like you and your Double Dutch BFF from 7th grade. For decades, it’s just been assumed that adult women will be wearing makeup at all hours of the day, and especially outside the house. I’m sure you wouldn’t be at all surprised to find out that last year, cosmetics companies reported annual profits of over 50 billion dollars in the US alone.

Women & Tattoos: Believe It Or Not, This Is Our Choice!  Whether you’ve got an infinity sign on your inner wrist or a dragon sprawling across your back, if you’re one of the 14 million Americans with a tattoo, your reasons for getting it are probably pretty personal. And yet – and yet! There is nothing quite like a tattoo on a woman to act as a lightning rod for public commentary.

For The Women With ZERO Interest In Being Role Models: #WeAreWithYou  …a famous woman is always held up to the standards of role model-hood, even if she never asked to be considered a role model. When I was growing up, the media was obsessed with telling us what terrible role models Paris Hilton, Nicole Richie, Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan were. The thing we never stopped to ask was, “are these women even trying to be role models?” Well, what do you think? Britney was trying to be a singer and make hit songs. Lindsay was trying to be an actress and make movies.