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Luke Sleepwalker
When I was a kid, I used to sleepwalk. Like a champ. Out the door, down the stairs, through the hall, round the kitchen, down another hall and wind up waking up in the room with my parents watching Nick at Nite, wondering why my dad was going on about witches and talking horses. Kind…
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A Helping Hand
New Yorkers get a bad rep for being “rude” all the time. You say “rude,” I think you mean “fast.” Yes, we move very quickly and don’t take kindly to things/people/strollers that happen to be in our way. But ask a New Yorker for help and they will be more than happy to oblige. Ask…
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Bo Knows Comedy
Bo Burnham is not only adorable. He’s also hysterical. [youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LVnS5cI0a00?rel=0] Bo Burnham’s standup special “what.” is available to stream instantly on The Netflix. It’s also on YouTube if you’re a Luddite and don’t believe in Netflix, but I don’t want to spoil anything for you. Basically, it’s avant-garde, hilarious, and probably incredibly offensive. But…
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3 AM
I don’t know if it’s stress, or neighbors, or some weird biological fault of mine, but for the past few weeks as far back as I can remember, I have been waking up at 3am every morning. [youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C-Naa1HXeDQ?rel=0] Oh, I must be lonely. That must be it. And when I say “awake,” I mean…
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What’s Your Flavor?
Big big news in the food world. Oreo, milk’s favourite cookie, has launched two new flavors: cookie dough and marshmallow crispy. Viscerally upsetting to me, avoiding gluten as I am (aside from a slip-up that resulted in a MASSIVE rash last week, thanks for sharing). Both sound amazing but could I get something gluten-free? Uh,…
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Technical Difficulties
Ever have one of those days? I swear it all started when I tried to update my iPhone 4 from iOS 5, which I have been happily using FOR YEARS, to iOS 7 so I can use the updated version of Skype. WELL. Not only did it not take for HOURS, but it caused a…
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Mega-Throwback Thursday!!!
When you visit the family, and the boxed wine gets flowing, eventually the photo albums creep out from their hiding place. What results then is a firestorm of Instagramming photos from decades ago! Awww! So cute, I was! This is one of my favourite photos of me, of all time. Look at this cute lil’…
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Forget Ugly Sweaters…
…Look, I’m pretty sure this whole “ugly sweater” craze that’s sweeping the nation is a ruse invented by the thrift shop industry in an attempt to sell more ugly sweaters. I sorta feel the same way about that hit song by Macklemore. Like, is wearing an ugly sweater supposed to be daring? Back in my…
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CRAVINGS
During last week’s bout of stomach flu, I completely lost my appetite. For everything. Can you blame me, though? Everything I ate just came right back up. Which hurts, actually, unless you eat very soft foods and liquids. I was really sick. How sick was I? Even the thought of drinking coffee turned my stomach. …
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Laundry Pickup Service
So last week I was sick. At the first sign of getting better, I realized my life was A MESS. Dirty clothes everywhere, near-empty seltzer bottles, random buckets lying around. I had to start somewhere and I started with laundry. My main concern with this Herculean task was being able to carry all my heavy…
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Poo-Pourri: I Am Not Making This Shit Up
I finally saw the full ad for Poo-Pourri, a product that promises to completely eliminate toilet odors from your life forever and ever. It’s real. And apparently, it works, too. But watching the video left me with a crappy feeling. Here’s another company trying to make money off our insecurities, screamed my gut. Look, fact…
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Re-Stringing the Pearls
So for Thanksgiving I went with my boyfriend and his entire extended family to a fancy fancy restaurant. Can you say nervous? And you know me, I would LIVE in sweatpants if I could. Getting fancy happens once in a very, very, very rare occurrence. But I donned an all-black ensemble and topped it off…
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Almond Joy
So I’m on a total almond kick lately, apparently. Remember this trail mix? Well, I have to say, Salted Roasted Almonds from Trader Joe’s are THA BOMB. I can’t stop eating these suckers! They will be the death of me. Well, it would surprise nobody to learn that I’m not having a great time lately. …
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I’m A Little Teapot, Apparently
I’ve sworn up and down that I’m a coffee person. Don’t worry! I still am! But I have a confession: I’ve been cheating on coffee…with tea. I know! I want to kick my own ass. Trust. But I’ve been trying different teas and not just because I’ve had the sniffles! Tea can be good! Sometimes! …
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Happy Krampus, Or Not
Typically celebrated on December 5th, Krampus is like the anti-Christmas. See, while jolly old St Nick brings presents for good little girls and boys, dear old Krampus comes along to punish the naughty ones – dragging them to his underworldly lair by their pigtails and suspenders and making them his slaves for all eternity. And…
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Thanksgiving is the new Black Friday
Black Friday – like Thanksgiving – has come and gone, but I’m still not quite over it. I’m sure some of you out there spent your T-gives fighting others consumers for The Hawtest Dealz in town. You probably thought, “What’s the harm? I’m not spending thanksgiving with my family, I might as well go shopping.”…
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1 Year Old!
I completely forgot! November 17th was my one-year anniversary of my two left-hand tattoos (in my head I called them “the twins” because they happened in the same sitting) Happy Birthday, babies!!!
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Practice Makes Perfect
A funny phenomenon at Comic Con (hee hee that rhymed) is that people dress up. I guess this isn’t so weird – it’s the month of Halloween, after all. But people go ALL OUT. And then, you walk around and take pictures of people’s costumes. Now, here’s the weird part. Cosplayers – people who dress…
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#45 West 12th Street
I have a crush… …on #45 West 12th Street. More than just a house It represents all I want for my future Arises like out of a dream Seems lost in time Is cool, comfortable, cozy. This is my princess castle, my mansion, my Barbie dream home Someday….
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Blogtember #15: Be Careful What You Wish For
“Life lately” is going incredibly well. Almost too well, in fact… I asked my hair stylist at my last bang trim to do a cute, asymmetrical chop. The result? Much too short! I’ve been growing out my unfortunate bang decision ever since! I couldn’t wait for fall weather! The heat was driving me insane and…