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Wading in Williamsburg
It’s officially blog canon now, how much I love the coastline of New York City. And with so many islands to choooooose from, there’s plenty of opportunities to smell the salty air and feel the water’s wind whipping your hair back and forth. But let’s say you want a more immersive experience. Let’s say you really want to…
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Happy 200th Birthday, Walt Whitman
I’ll be honest with you: The first time I picked up Leaves of Grass (in college), it bored me to tears. Maybe it’s a thing you have to grow into? I for sure skimmed the book to pass the class, but didn’t understand why so many people considered it a classic. It was definitely the…
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The Beauty of Bushwick
My Instagram account is now a street art appreciation account. This blog is now a street art appreciation blog. With spring sloooowly inching the mercury higher, I’ve been making little efforts to get out of bed and get out more. The smallest of these efforts being strolling trips out and about in my…
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So This Is A Brooklyn Spring
In the countryside, Springtime is evidenced through gradually warming temperatures. The daylight lasts longer. And the trees start to bloom. In Brooklyn, the telltale sign of spring’s arrival is not the chirps of the returning birds, but rather, the throbbing rumble of a subwoofer being blasted from somewhere down the road. ALL. DAY.…
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On The (Greenpoint) Waterfront
I. Love. Being on the NYC coastline. I like beaches??? Idk. There’s something about being on the EDGE of land. Where land meets water. It feels RISKY and DANGEROUS, like when I went through that weird phase of putting bowls and coffee cups close to the edge of countertops and tables absentmindedly, RIP…
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The L Train Is SAVED!! Maybe.
We’ve been dreading it. Planning around it. Making forced gallows-humor jokes about it. And now… Well, in a bizarrely unilateral move, Gov. (ptooey!) Cuomo announced that there would be no L train shutdown. Couldn’t have said it any better myself, cryptically ominous subway tile graffiti. In a totally “everything means nothing” move, that bitter pill that we’ve been gagging on…
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Top 5 NYC Neighborhoods I Have Lived In
Ten years in New York! This photo was taken a little over a month after I moved here and thus, began the longest and most fulfilling relationship of my life — HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA !!!! But I haven’t exactly stayed put all this time. Over the past ten…
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How To Thrift Shop like A Brooklyn Hipster, Or Somebody Who Looks Like They Might Be In A Band
I honestly feel like I don’t get enough credit for being as well-dressed as I am. But I AM! I am so well-dressed, in fact, that a few years ago, at the John Lennon memorial sing-along, I got cornered mid-song by a middle-aged man who interrogated me: “Hey, don’t I know you?” “I don’t think so,”…
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And Not A Zero Fuck Was Given That Day
I had an EXHAUSTING day on Friday. I just wanted to share this with you because it was one of those days that I live for, the days where you work yourself past the point of exhaustion to a state of accomplished *bliss* and everything else melts away. I don’t talk about my job…
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? Don’t Be Alarmed… ?
It is a scientific FACT (probably) — that at any given hour of any given day, in any given neighborhood of New York City, there will be an alarm going off. And any given New Yorker will promptly respond to any given alarm with… annoyance. NOT “alarm.” Sirens, car alarms, smoke detectors? I…
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New York, I ❤️ You (And You ❤️ Me Back)
Guys, let me tell you about the New Jersey Turnpike. See, you never really know how much you love something until you lose it. This was how I realized I was stanning Sasha Velour in season 9: when it looked like she might be in danger of having to lip sync for her…
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Nice Landing
After all the upheaval that was the past few months, I think you’ll be happy to hear that I’ve made a rather nice landing. For example: my landings. Yes, on the landings in between floors of my building, people leave free stuff for everyone to sift through! Old furniture, clothes, dishes, and…
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This Is Why It Takes Forever To Walk Anywhere In The City In The Rain
UMBRELLAS. It’s because everyone is carrying umbrellas. A normal sidewalk is like a stream, and its pedestrians like fish. Foot traffic hinges on the ability of walkers to blithely slither past each other, faster fish weaving and bobbing through schools of slower fish. Umbrellas, though. A cumbersome umbrella can double, even…
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Angry Birds
And at first it was cute, but now, I’m afraid in my own home. So I might have mentioned on social media (Twitter, probably, appropriately enough) that a family of small birds has built a nest underneath my kitchen window. I was so excited to have “new neighbors” and I love nature! Right? …
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New Neighbors
New York City is a diverse, fascinating place to live. You never know who you’re going to meet! And one’s own neighborhood can be a thrilling opportunity to get to know people from all sorts of exotic cultures. Why, take a look at my new neighbors! Just a few months ago, some new neighbors moved in…
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Springtime in New York Is A Lie: Know Ye The Signs
There are some who will tell you that the weather in New York City is unpredictable. They are full of bullshit. It’s actually very easy to predict the change of seasons in New York City after you’ve experienced it a few times. For years, I promoted the idea that In New York, It Is Winter Until…
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Dear Woodhull Hospital: it’s NOT me…IT’S YOU
Picture it: Sicily, 1922! No, just kidding, more like Brooklyn, six months ago. I’d just had an appointment with my dermatologist and it was time to schedule a six-month follow up with reception and it went a little something like THIS: Receptionist: how about March 3rd at 9:00am? Me, to myself: that’s two days after…
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Good News! This Week Is Over!… Good News!
Can we somehow reach the Barenaked Ladies for comment on this past week? Because I would hope they’d say something along the lines of “Wow, that’s a lot of stuff to have happen in a week.” or something. Hi! I’m back again with some good news, and let’s kick it off with writing stuff!…
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New York Holidays
Last Friday was National Donut Day. Aren’t there like, five of those every year? Nation, what the fuck are you doing? As a New Yorker, I feel less and less in touch with the rest of “the nation.” I mean, y’all made Trump a thing. Thanks, Nation! I think it’s time for New York to…
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Wedding Presents for New York Couples
It’s wedding season! Which means not only are you going to have to figure out what to wear to an “elegant laid-back formal BBQ” reception, you’re also going to have to bring A GIFT. New York City couples are notoriously hard to shop for because they have everything they need already, and no room for…