Holidays

NEW YEAR NEW ME HAHAHAHA

  Okay, I can concede that the title of this post is… aggressively weird. I just find it a little bit too on the nose that the New Year happens to coincide almost perfectly with the giant shake-up of my life which was a HUGE breakup and MOVING

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NEW YEAR NEW ME HAHAHAHA

  Okay, I can concede that the title of this post is… aggressively weird. I just find it a little bit too on the nose that the New Year happens to coincide almost perfectly with the giant shake-up of my life which was a HUGE breakup and MOVING

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How Was Your Christmas? I Got My Period!

  Yep, so, I was worried about how this Christmas was going to be. I was worried I would be lonely? I was not lonely. I was worried I would be sad? Yes, I was sad, but more importantly —   —

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How Was Your Christmas? I Got My Period!

  Yep, so, I was worried about how this Christmas was going to be. I was worried I would be lonely? I was not lonely. I was worried I would be sad? Yes, I was sad, but more importantly —   —

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Dead People Christmas Playlist!!!

  Ho, ho, ho! Christmas is almost here! I’m still trying to ‘get it up’ for this holiday. Yes, honestly. I’m headed “home” for Christmas today after putting in a couple hours at the studio, and you know what I’m

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Dead People Christmas Playlist!!!

  Ho, ho, ho! Christmas is almost here! I’m still trying to ‘get it up’ for this holiday. Yes, honestly. I’m headed “home” for Christmas today after putting in a couple hours at the studio, and you know what I’m

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Okay, NOW I Can Start Getting Jazzed For Christmas

  As I begin this draft, it is December 9th, 2017 — the day AFTER John Lennon Day — and big, fat flakes are sticking to the YES STILL GREEN leaves on the tree outside my window. Have I mentioned

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Okay, NOW I Can Start Getting Jazzed For Christmas

  As I begin this draft, it is December 9th, 2017 — the day AFTER John Lennon Day — and big, fat flakes are sticking to the YES STILL GREEN leaves on the tree outside my window. Have I mentioned

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Nothing’s Gonna Change My World

It’s December 9th, and you know what that means. It means that yesterday, I spent NINE AND A HALF HOURS in the cold singing Beatles songs with tourists and fellow fanatics alike. I joke that this is my only religious

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Nothing’s Gonna Change My World

It’s December 9th, and you know what that means. It means that yesterday, I spent NINE AND A HALF HOURS in the cold singing Beatles songs with tourists and fellow fanatics alike. I joke that this is my only religious

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Being Thankful in 2017

  I think I can honestly say that 2017 was probably one of the worst years of my life.   YAY, what an uplifting opening!   Let’s examine the facts, though: Terrible breakup. My puppy died. Trump was “President.” My

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Being Thankful in 2017

  I think I can honestly say that 2017 was probably one of the worst years of my life.   YAY, what an uplifting opening!   Let’s examine the facts, though: Terrible breakup. My puppy died. Trump was “President.” My

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Is It Spring? Yes, It’s Spring! A Poem.

If the trees are sprouting leaves And you’re wearing short sleeves And the wine in your glass is rosé If you’re delinquent on your taxes You don’t even need to aks us “Is it spring?” BECAUSE ITS SPRING HIP HIP

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Is It Spring? Yes, It’s Spring! A Poem.

If the trees are sprouting leaves And you’re wearing short sleeves And the wine in your glass is rosé If you’re delinquent on your taxes You don’t even need to aks us “Is it spring?” BECAUSE ITS SPRING HIP HIP

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God Is Punishing Me… With Puke

Let’s back this thing up.   Over Christmas, you may recall, I found myself vomiting and suffering in the absolute extreme. I thought maybe it was a flu? Or a fluke. One of the two. It wasn’t the first time

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God Is Punishing Me… With Puke

Let’s back this thing up.   Over Christmas, you may recall, I found myself vomiting and suffering in the absolute extreme. I thought maybe it was a flu? Or a fluke. One of the two. It wasn’t the first time

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Good News! I Finished My Round Of Antibiotics, Now I Can Drink Again!

Hello, I’m alive! (…-ish) So I finished my last dose of antibiotics last night! That’s a week of antibiotics! Phew!  You may recall that last week (when this picture was taken) I was pretty much dying of bronchitis and sinusitis. Well,

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Good News! I Finished My Round Of Antibiotics, Now I Can Drink Again!

Hello, I’m alive! (…-ish) So I finished my last dose of antibiotics last night! That’s a week of antibiotics! Phew!  You may recall that last week (when this picture was taken) I was pretty much dying of bronchitis and sinusitis. Well,

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Quit Hating On Valentine’s Day, Seriously, It’s Not THAT BAD – But This One Was…

This is NOT a picture of me from Valentine’s Day, 2014. This is a picture of what was supposed to happen on Valentine’s Day 2014. It’s the second week of February, which means it’s time for everyone to start BITCHING ABOUT HOW

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Quit Hating On Valentine’s Day, Seriously, It’s Not THAT BAD – But This One Was…

This is NOT a picture of me from Valentine’s Day, 2014. This is a picture of what was supposed to happen on Valentine’s Day 2014. It’s the second week of February, which means it’s time for everyone to start BITCHING ABOUT HOW

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New Year’s Resolutions? Well, Why Not.

Retire the phrase “tfw.” It was funny for a while, but now I’ve got that feeling that it’s overplayed. Stop snarking on popular things — because sometimes popular things are popular because they’re good — like rosé, and Beyoncé (NOTE: I recognize

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New Year’s Resolutions? Well, Why Not.

Retire the phrase “tfw.” It was funny for a while, but now I’ve got that feeling that it’s overplayed. Stop snarking on popular things — because sometimes popular things are popular because they’re good — like rosé, and Beyoncé (NOTE: I recognize

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Have Yourself A Pukey Little Christmas

Christmas 2016 is one we won’t soon forget. Even if we wanted to. Oh, we had a really nice time, don’t get me wrong! At the last minute, my boyfriend asked me to come with him to his family Christmas

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Have Yourself A Pukey Little Christmas

Christmas 2016 is one we won’t soon forget. Even if we wanted to. Oh, we had a really nice time, don’t get me wrong! At the last minute, my boyfriend asked me to come with him to his family Christmas

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GOOD NEWS: Few And Far Between, But Still To Be Found

I hate myself for saying this, but this candle is LIT AF. *groan, shudder* Welcome back to the weekly GOOD NEWS. I had, um, the HARDEST TIME finding good news this week (do I say that every week?). Well, I

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GOOD NEWS: Few And Far Between, But Still To Be Found

I hate myself for saying this, but this candle is LIT AF. *groan, shudder* Welcome back to the weekly GOOD NEWS. I had, um, the HARDEST TIME finding good news this week (do I say that every week?). Well, I

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A Photo With The Rockefeller Christmas Tree

Well, look at me. Me and the Rockefeller Christmas tree. Trying to force some festive shit out of this anus of a year. 2016. I repeat: 2016 was an asshole. Six years ago this month, I got a visit from

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A Photo With The Rockefeller Christmas Tree

Well, look at me. Me and the Rockefeller Christmas tree. Trying to force some festive shit out of this anus of a year. 2016. I repeat: 2016 was an asshole. Six years ago this month, I got a visit from

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You May Say I’m A Dreamer, But I’m Not The Only One

The ONLY December holiday that matters is December 8th, tbh. Every year, on the anniversary of John Lennon’s murder, strangers become family and sing around the Imagine mosaic in Strawberry Fields, across the street from where John breathed his last.

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You May Say I’m A Dreamer, But I’m Not The Only One

The ONLY December holiday that matters is December 8th, tbh. Every year, on the anniversary of John Lennon’s murder, strangers become family and sing around the Imagine mosaic in Strawberry Fields, across the street from where John breathed his last.

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What I’m Thankful For:

  this corner of the sofa. You’re great. Never change, baby.   Worst Cooks in America on Netflix — thanks for reminding me of a time before terror.   Clue for iPhone. Thanks for making sense of my body. I feel more

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What I’m Thankful For:

  this corner of the sofa. You’re great. Never change, baby.   Worst Cooks in America on Netflix — thanks for reminding me of a time before terror.   Clue for iPhone. Thanks for making sense of my body. I feel more

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Thanksgiving? What Thanksgiving?

Ho, ho, ho, my fellow hoes! I call you “hoes” like “whores” because we all know there’s absolutely nothing wrong with sex work as long as nobody’s being exploited and everyone has given consent! Merry Christmas!   Yeah, assholes, CHRISTMAS.

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Thanksgiving? What Thanksgiving?

Ho, ho, ho, my fellow hoes! I call you “hoes” like “whores” because we all know there’s absolutely nothing wrong with sex work as long as nobody’s being exploited and everyone has given consent! Merry Christmas!   Yeah, assholes, CHRISTMAS.

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Currently… in November 2016

FEELING:  Completely numb. It’s funny, I read back over last month’s “Currently” post and remember how desperate and stressed out I felt. I feel like a week after I wrote that, things took a massive turn for the better, and things

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Currently… in November 2016

FEELING:  Completely numb. It’s funny, I read back over last month’s “Currently” post and remember how desperate and stressed out I felt. I feel like a week after I wrote that, things took a massive turn for the better, and things

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Christmas in October

  It isn’t even Halloween yet, and I’ve already made a Christmas Spotify playlist that’s over 3 hours long. And I’ve been listening to it since September. I have become that which I once hated. I’m going to be a Grinch up

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Christmas in October

  It isn’t even Halloween yet, and I’ve already made a Christmas Spotify playlist that’s over 3 hours long. And I’ve been listening to it since September. I have become that which I once hated. I’m going to be a Grinch up

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