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2015 in Review: Fourth Quarter
OCTOBER School Shooting Curriculum (10/5/15): “School used to prepare kids for the future: college, career, success. But now, schools should take new aim (all puns intended) to prepare kids for their actual future: getting shot…” Guilty Pleasure Wedding Reality Show (10/19/15): “Greg, this cake is what I’ve always dreamed of. I just can’t take a…
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2015 in Review: Third Quarter
JULY Living With Roommates vs. A SigOth (7/9/15): “When you live with a roommate, you are a constant thorn in their side. Your dishes. Your dirty tennis shoes. Your noisy breathing! To your roommate, you are a necessary evil they literally must live with because they can’t afford the rent on their own.” If…
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2015 in Review: Second Quarter
APRIL I Have A Crush (4/4/15): “Brooklyn’s humble, eclectic charm was calling to me. While my old haunts were burning down, moving out, or turning into 7-11’s, I turned to Brooklyn’s vintage shops and offbeat museums for respite. When Manhattan rushed me, I’d spend carefree weekends winding down windy streets.” Jiminy Crickets! (4/23/15): “No stranger…
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2015 in Review: First Quarter
JANUARY Adjusting to the New Job (1/22/15): “Most days I go home tired. Some days, I go home feeling like a total failure. I feel so defeated it’s hard to breathe as I walk to the subway. And some other days, things go so well that I feel like dancing all the way home. But…
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Dear Santa…
Dear Santa: I don’t ask for much in the way of gifts and presents, because what I really want can’t sit under the tree with a shiny red bow on top. Santa, if you think (as I do) that I’ve been good this year, I will be even better next year if you bring me…
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Macy’s Charlie Brown Christmas Windows!
Charlie Brown’s face up there pretty much sums up what it’s like to live in New York City during the Christmas tourism season. On the one hand, everything is festive and pretty from the lights on the high street shops to the carollers down in the subway. On the other hand, it’s annoying as fuck…
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Christmas Presents for Girls!
Whether they’re your platonic BFF, your friend with benefits, or your partner in life, you know someone who identifies as female. You love her dearly, so this Christmas, give her the gift of comfort and joy with these gifts that will make her life safer and easier!! Nike Women’s Flex 2014 Rn Running Shoes for…
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5 Years Later
Five years ago, I sat on a cold marble bench, I watched this tree twinkle under the arch, and I got the phone call. It still doesn’t make sense to me, that you’ll never be there again. You were always there. Sitting in the back row, pulling up the street, the corner booth in the…
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5 Christmas Traditions!
I’m sure all you people with nice, normal families have nice, normal Christmas traditions like “baking cookies” and “singing carols around the piano” but my family is neither nice, nor normal. Our Christmas traditions make Clark Griswold want to hide in the attic and never come out. But family is family, and I’d be lying…
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Say Yes To The Dress
I always catch a face-full of heck when I tell people that my favourite TV show is Say Yes to the Dress. Now, before you roll your eyes and assume I’m the type of girl who wears a unicorn onesie to bed, I’ll have you know two things: number one, my unicorn onesie is quality…
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5 Best Holiday Gifts For The Man In Your Life
Sure, you could buy that special lad in your life a shiny expensive watch, but that’s so predictable. A good gift is one they’ll use every day, that will remind him of you, and how he should never cheat with any of the way hotter girls from the gym because you’re “difficult”. Your so-called “emotional…
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Words for Sale
Every blogger’s dream is to one day get that email. “Networking opportunity brand campaign paid compensation?” they chirp, “Outstanding opportunity exposure! Payment for Talent opportunity!” Buzzwords buzz but you zero in on that word: PAID. It’s as though you’ve been blogging for years on a deserted island hoping that someone would rescue you, and you…
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QUIZ! Which Christmas Song Are You?
1. When do you put up Christmas decorations? A. When I have the time and energy. B. When my Tinder date is there to help. It’s called “foreplay.” C. The day after Thanksgiving! It’s always THE DAY AFTER THANKSGIVING. Earlier than that is TOO SOON, but if you don’t have decorations up by Black Friday,…
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5 Fandom Friday: Christmas Wishes
Okay so I already got ONE Christmas present this year from my mom: it’s a Soda Stream. And I love it so much I couldn’t possibly want anything more! Oh except maybe… 1. My dad to sing carols off-key He does this high-pitched, airy yodel? Jury’s still out whether he’s putting us on or if…
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OOPS! Accident Prone!
” A C C I D E N T P R O N E “ If four syllables describe me better, I’ve yet to find them. I’m the queen of accidental self-injury, breaking things, and ruining everything! I’m Lucille Ball re-incarnate, down to the mournful wail of defeat. Please refer to fig. A: A Brief…
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The Twelve Freakouts of Christmas, pt. 2
For the 7th Christmas Freakout My True Love Gave to Me: The I Just Want to See the Rockefeller Tree Without Getting Trampled By Tourists Freakout “Is the entire population of New Jersey AND Connecticut here ALL at the SAME TIME? Who’s watching Long Island?!? Hold my damn purse, I’m going to crowd-surf to the…
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My First Date with Lush
Yes, you read that right: my first. After I shared about my struggles with acne, I took the advice of the comments and got my butt to Lush on the Upper West Side. It was a rainy Thursday afternoon, and I was the only shopper in the store, with three knowledgeable and enthusiastic employees. We…
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In A Relationship with Beauty: It’s Complicated
I am, I’m sure, and AWESOME girlfriend. So when my boyfriend observes: “You have a complicated relationship with beauty,” my first instinct is to say, “All women have a complicated relationship with beauty, it’s because of society,” and while I still believe this is true, I must admit, I Have A Complicated Relationship With Beauty. …
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New York City is FULL of Surprises!
I want to believe that New York City is like a wilderness: you can mark the trees, study your paths, and still be surprised to discover new things all the time. Brooklyn certainly feels that way! Yesterday, though, I discovered new areas of Manhattan that showed me there is still much to explore and be…
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5 Fandom Friday: Holiday Recommendations
I’m going to be completely honest with you (like uh, when am I ever not?) and say, I have no idea what this prompt means, taken as a whole. BUT, taken one piece at a time: “Holiday” and “Recommendations,” I gather it means “Tell People What To Do This Holiday.” I love telling people what…