So This Is A Brooklyn Spring

  In the countryside, Springtime is evidenced through gradually warming temperatures. The daylight lasts longer. And the trees start to bloom.   In Brooklyn, the telltale sign of spring’s arrival is not the chirps of the returning birds, but rather, the throbbing rumble of a subwoofer being blasted from somewhere[…]

On The (Greenpoint) Waterfront

  I. Love. Being on the NYC coastline.   I like beaches??? Idk. There’s something about being on the EDGE of land. Where land meets water. It feels RISKY and DANGEROUS, like when I went through that weird phase of putting bowls and coffee cups close to the edge of[…]

Will The Real Comedian Please *NOT* Stand Up?

  My least favorite part of the movie where the comedian plays a comedian is the part where they do comedy.   For example: Obvious Child. Sleepwalk With Me. The Big Sick. All movies —and there are many more — where a Known Comedian™ plays a comedian in their movie.   To be fair,[…]

When I See A Cupcake…

  My favorite food is cake. Period. End of the most Leo sentence ever.   Why wouldn’t your favorite food be cake??? Cake is obviously the best food. Here are the reasons: you’re supposed to eat cake at the END of the meal because it’s so special, you have to save the best[…]

⚡ Safe Spaces & Trigger Warnings ⚡

  In my experience, the people who are most vocal in their objections to Safe Spaces and Trigger Warnings are the exact same people who are fortunate enough to not need Safe Spaces or Trigger Warnings.   The way I understand it, Safe Spaces are a thing I can’t imagine anyone objecting[…]

When I’m Stressed Out, I Wet My Plants

  I’m not amazing at self-care. Honestly. I’m not really good at nurturing my own growth, taking the time to be deliberate and caring, and being aware of the ways I take care of my physical being.   But I’m great with plants.   My plants are bountiful, green, tall, and[…]

Currently… in April 2019

  FEELING:  Strangely reinvigorated! I was very busy, and then I wasn’t, and I’m slowly (without putting a lot of pressure on myself) getting my life together in my downtime. Going to the dentist. Touching up my roots. Washing my sheets and blankets. I have a LOT of blankets, ok,[…]

MAYO MIXES: Should We? Why DID We?

  You know mayonnaise is a huge part of my #personal brand. It’s all about the THREE M’S: Mayonnaise. Murder. and… Manhattan? I think. Yeah. Good intro.   So I just saw that Heinz — the ketchup company — has introduced these two new “mayo mixes” to the market: MayoMust[…]

New True Crime Faves

  Ok ok ok you know I’ve devoured every true crime podcast and true crime documentary I can get my hands on, and I’m always on the lookout for FRESH MEAT to sink my maudlin teeth into. And boy, have I got some DOOZIES for you today! It’s Wednesday, and[…]

Trader Joe’s Tuesday: Mini Brie Bites

  Tastes Like:  I’m gonna try to keep this under 500 words. It’s gonna be hard. In the past, the circles of “Good Brie” and “Affordable Brie” were miles apart from each other, and in the vast crevasse between, lived many regrettable BAD BRIES which I bought in desperate need of[…]

I Just Wanna Know

  It hit me the other day when I was at work, on a Saturday. I had the studio space to myself and was working on a large-scale (messy) task, playing a podcast for my enjoyment (The Bowery Boys Epsiode #169 The Tallest Building In New York: A Short History[…]

Touched By… 👻 A GHOST?!?!? 👻

  I’ve often confirmed on this blog that I believe in ghosts, but I don’t think I’ve ever told you why. It’s because I’ve been touched by a ghost. TWICE.    Let’s go back to 2003, 2004. The College Years! I was at Broome Community College working towards my Associate’s Degree in[…]

Everything I Know About Sex I Learned From *Musical Theatre*

I have been a theatre nerd ALL. MY. LIFE. True story: my parents remember me dancing around to “One” from A Chorus Line when I was a toddler, so baby, as long as I could talk, I’ve been a Broadway Baby! So of course, the first person to really sit me down and teach[…]

Recipes That Prove That Humans Are Monsters

  I feel pretty gross and guilty for my mayo-cheese-and-sriracha sandwiches. That’s what they are. Gluten free bread, a thick layer of Kewpie mayo on both slices, a hearty drizzle of Sriracha hot sauce, and two slices of Provolone cheese. I’m a bad person. I’m disgusting. This is my favorite[…]

🎶 Where Have All The Napkins Gone? 🎶

  I’ve always looked up to Amy Sedaris. You know, she was born across the river from my hometown? And ever since her Comedy Central TV show Strangers With Candy filled my adolescent eyeballs with its raunchy, subversive humor, I’ve definitely known who she is. You can’t miss her. Beyond her iconic[…]

Doggy Daycare Drama Coach

  Some people are sports people, some people are theatre people.   Hear me out.   Some people are sports people, some people are theatre people. This is a fact. And you can’t really be a “sports person” AND a “theatre person” and this conflict is borne out in High School[…]

FUSHTRATED

  I loooove reality TV. Like, I’m PASSIONATE about it. I’ve watched COUNTLESS shows of ALL DIFFERENT kinds: Dating shows. Celebreality shows. Cooking competitions, dancing competitions, modeling competitions, wedding dress purchasing competitions …   Now usually, when you’re super passionate about something, NATURALLY, you might consider participating in it yourself![…]

Grilled Cheese and Tomato

  Let’s get first things first: I am a diner gal. I loooove a good diner. I feel reeeeal comfortable in a vinyl booth, with a laminated menu in my hands, stacking up little jelly pots and creamer pods.   I came of age in diners. I think many of you did,[…]

March Through The Snow???

  Ok so let’s look at the facts:   It’s March 4th and it’s been declared a SNOW DAY in New York City. It’s already snowed more in MARCH than it has the ENTIRE WINTER BEFORE THIS.   I CALL SHENANIGANS!   You will recall, our first major snowfall of[…]