Texting + Stairs = DANGER!

  As the famous nursery rhyme “Ring Around the Rosie” posits, “We all fall down.” Some of us more spectacularly than others.   Picture this: Monday night, around 8pm. I’ve just left work and I’m heading home while texting my boss about the progress we’re making. I do this all the[…]

On Top Of Things

  I had the Perfect Day™ the other day. Not in that it was particularly good, more in the way that I felt EXTREMELY GOOD ABOUT IT. It was one of those days when I was SO on top of things — now, I’m not scatter-brained by any means, but on this[…]

GOOD NEWS! I’m Busy As Hell, Which Is A Good Thing!

  Oof my gawd, this week is busy but amazing! It started on Saturday, when I finally made it out to the Guggenheim to see Dahn Vo’s exhibit “Take My Breath Away,” and looking back, it definitely did! It was also my first time at the ‘heim, or the Guug,[…]

Take My Breath Away, Dahn Vo! at The Guggenheim

  COOL STORY BRO: Four years ago, during my second season giving ghost tours in Lower Manhattan, City Hall Park was overtaken by an installation by Dahn (pronounced “Yon,” I googled it) Vo, called “We The People.” Click the link! Did you click it? So basically, it was life-sized CHUNKS[…]

GOOD NEWS! I’m Busy Work-work-work-work-work-workin’!

  Wondering why it’s so quiet around here? No, it’s not because I’m so depressed that I can’t get it together to actually form a sentence — that was last week. This week I’m doing a lot better, because I’m at work! Yes, thank GAWD, I have something to take my mind off the[…]

Currently… in April 2018

  FEELING:  Deep in the throes of PMS + Mercury retrograde + depression, FUN. Fun fun fun. It’s really messed me up, and the endlessly cold and grey weather doesn’t help. I’m struggling to see a light at the end of the tunnel or any hope that things will change as I feel[…]

GOOD NEWS! A Day Late, And Hastily Thrown Together TBH

  Well, what can I say? It’s a combination of PMS, Mercury Retrograde, generally overcast weather, and terrible depression! I haven’t been sleeping well, and when I am, my dreams are really shitty: like, I had a dream that RuPaul invited me to camp with him at Burning Man, and[…]

GOOD NEWS! I *FINALLY* Touched Up My Roots!!!

  So this week was a week off from the studio, and I made myself to-do lists EVERY DAY. At the top of the list was TOUCH UP MY ROOTS. They were getting to be like 2.5 inches long, and it wasn’t the BEST touch-up job (can we say, “polka[…]

Missed Connection (???)

  Have you ever posted a “missed connection”? Have you ever read the “missed connections”? Have you ever missed a connection?   I confess to you, I may have fucked up and missed one, myself.   It was A LONG time ago. Like, the last week of February. It was that one[…]

A Pox On Arie

  I’m still mad.   Yep, hex the shit out of him. For, as I’m learning, men don’t mature. They just become salt-and-pepper human shitbags. You’d think that a man of 36 would be capable of having meaningful relationships? But, no.   ICYMI, apparently, Arie (aka “The Worst Bachelor In History”),[…]

I Wanna Talk About Bras For A Minute

I think that the worst way to gaslight someone would be to steal all their bras and reverse the adjustment of the straps so you make them think that their big titty got bigger and their small titty got smaller and they stand in front of the mirror lookin at[…]

GOOD NEWS! Congrats to the WINNER of ALL STARS 3!!!

  Hello hello hello!!!   I am *not* revealing (Ru-vealing?) any spoilers, I am just going to say that I was VERY PLEASED with the outcome of All Stars 3, even if I had to pause the episode four minutes and fourteen seconds before the end to take an Anxiety Shit before[…]

So Long, Claire’s Accessories

  Such childhood, very nostalgia.   Sad news, my friends: Claire’s Accessories is said to be going bankrupt. Don’t it always seem to go that you don’t know what you’ve got ’til it’s gone? Claire’s resides in a very special place of my heart, because I’ve never grown out of[…]

So You Think You Can Bangs

  SO YOU’RE THINKING ABOUT CUTTING SOME BANGS INTO YOUR HAIR??? YOU MIGHT THINK TWICE IF YOU KNEW WHAT BANGS ARE REALLY LIKE…   You Will Never Wear Hats! The hat band will press your bangs down, and suddenly, they will be in your eyes, down to your nose, creeping into your[…]

GOOD NEWS! Have Your Pussy and Eat Cake Too

  Ummm, I started this draft when I was on my period and craving cake, and I saw these vulva cupcakes and WOAH. Yes. Yum. Please (via MetroUK).   This week (yesterday!) was International Women’s Day, which I have complicated feelings about now? the future isnt female. the future is[…]

If I Only Had 48 Hours To Live

  Yep, I’m a morbid goth kid 4 life. But I think about this a lot: how I want to spend the end of my life. Frankly, it’s a lot easier (for me) to idealize the end of my life, than to imagine or plan for the next five years, fifteen years, FIFTY years.[…]

For Your Consideration: I Should Be The Bachelorette!

  Attn: ABC, Bachelor Franchise, Chris Harrison, et al:   You have a problem.   Arie’s season debuted to record low ratings. People are turning away from the franchise in record numbers. You got your asses handed to you by Young Sheldon, for crying out loud! Let’s not even speak of the Bachelor in Paradise. Let’s NOT. Your[…]

Omelettes – In The Microwave!!!

  Backstory: I joined a Facebook community about Depression Meals. What’s a “depression meal,” you ask? Well, according to the group, basically anything that you eat while depressed? There’s a good variety between like really tragic and lazy meals (leftover white rice with ketchup?), decadent “treat yo’self” meals (cakes and[…]