Graveyard of Dead Blogger Cliches

Hang around the blogging community long enough and you will become familiar with its clichés.  Like, remember that year we were all obsessed with chevron?  EVERYTHING had to be chevron – blog banners, blog backgrounds, EXPECIALLY blog buttons!  Why, you just weren’t a serious blogger if you sported plain horizontal stripes – they had to be POINTY!

And then, one day, we started to not care so much about chevron (because mint blue stole his spotlight, HA!) and now we barely even talk about chevron anymore.  He’s like, a ghost…a ghost of our shameful, chevron past!

The dark and creepy side of long-dead clichés that walk…among us…like zombies!  If you dare, come down with me to the crypt of overtired blogger clichés that we must lay to rest once and for all:

“OMG I spent way too much money lol”

Oh, thanks for reminding me how poor I am, and feel guilty about splurging on all the things I buy!  I’m sorry you feel guilty about your purchase, Suze Orman, but don’t try to foist that complex onto me!  You’re a grown-ass woman, You Do You!  You don’t have to guiltily explain to me how you spend your hard-earned dollars!  You work hard for the money, so go on and treat YOU right!  If that means spending extra cents on Tsum Tsums, don’t apologize for it!  Heck, those things are hella cute!  If you lavish your extra funds on Lush products, go crazy.  Everybody has a splurge, don’t feel guilty over your pleasures!

“I’m so bad for eating this lol”

Normally I would never tell a blogger it’s her job to be socially responsible all the time, but this comment cuts too close.  Every time you post a picture of a cupcake or sweets table with the caption “I hate myself!” I worry for you.  As someone who has both struggled with disordered eating and watched loved ones struggle, I see that kind of language and alarms go off.  Maybe you’re joking about it because you’re trying to work up the courage to get help?  Or, you really do hate yourself every time you eat and you just haven’t put two-and-two together yet to realize that you shouldn’t feel guilty about nourishing your body.  Let’s stop making light of “gonna spend the rest of my life on the treadmill smh” not just because it is triggering for members of our community who struggle with these self-loathing thoughts every day, but also, won’t somebody think of the children??  We’re constantly surrounded by messages in the media telling us to be ashamed of our bodies.  Why perpetuate that?  Why continue to put that out there?  Please, friends, let’s stop food-shaming ourselves and others will see our example.

“I feel so low because I don’t have as many followers as everyone else!”

At least once a week, a blog post about Imposter Syndrome crosses my dash.  I’m guilty of having written this same post many times myself.  Blog envy is real.  The struggle is daily.  Post content, tweet content, and…crickets.  No wonder we all feel inadequate!  And what do we do when we feel?  WE BLOG!  That’s why we are BLOGGERS.  So for this last headstone, I propose we do away with the Imposter Syndrome posts!  Everybody, repeat after me:  I WILL NEVER HAVE AS MANY FOLLOWERS AS KIM KARDASHIAN.  Now that we’ve all gotten that out of our system, we can stop feeling the need to compare to each other and CELEBRATE each other!  Vix wrote an amazing piece on bloggers helping other bloggers and it is emoji-of-hands-spread-apart-with-glitter-in-between perfect.  Instead of side-eyeing the bitch whose post got picked up by a bigger blog, or gets 20,000 more views than you, and then crying in the bathtub over it like a Prince music video, Tweet her link out!  Celebrate this blogging culture and be welcoming and inclusive to everyone!  It’s not the Hunger Games, and you’re not Katniss, so don’t be cut-throat.  Be HAPPY to be a part of it and happiness will come back to you!

I hope we have exorcized some evil blog spirits today.  What blogging clichés do you think should be laid to rest, for once and for all? RIP chevron pattern.


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