A Pox On Arie

  I’m still mad.   Yep, hex the shit out of him. For, as I’m learning, men don’t mature. They just become salt-and-pepper human shitbags. You’d think that a man of 36 would be capable of having meaningful relationships? But, no.   ICYMI, apparently, Arie (aka “The Worst Bachelor In History”),[…]

There’s A Place For Us… ? Somewhere ?

  Guess what? I guest-starred on a podcast!   Yes, AGAIN.   My friends at Did You Hear The One…? had me back to tell a LONGER story with A LOT MORE SWEARING!   I told a story about one-night stands, puke, and my favorite thing of all: NEW YORK.[…]

How I Learned To Love The Beatles

I wish this story wasn’t about a boy. I sincerely do. But it’s at least a little bit about a boy. File it under doing the right thing for the wrong reasons. Sure, I’d always liked The Beatles, yeah, yeah, yeah. I’d played the records in my parents’ basement and danced[…]

The Least Normal Dates I’ve Ever Had In My Life

So the other day I was watching The Bachelor (like you do) and after I recovered from Raven giggling about assaulting her ex-boyfriend (hold on, I promise I’m going somewhere with this, but OMG wtf that was the most horrifying thing I’ve ever seen on The Bachelor), Raven raved to the cameras about what a great date[…]

Laziness

My angel cherubs, let me advise you: be very wary of people who have no trouble picking a favorite book. It usually indicates that they have very little basis for comparison, if you know what I mean. I mean they must not read much! I really hate when websites prompt me[…]