Cylons At Home

I don’t actually know how I feel about this, but my house is wired.  Networked.  Vulnerable to Cylon attack.  I live with intelligent computers who secretly hate me.  Okay, that’s a little dramatic.  Maybe they just don’t like me.

This has been a scorching summer, one for the record books.  The first thing we set up in our new apartment in June was the air conditioners:  one in the kitchen, one in the bedroom.  Then my boyfriend got fancy:  he installed some dangly doo-hickey that makes it so you can control the air conditioners not only by remote control, but with your phone. 

This is the dangly doo-hickey.  It’s actually cute, I must admit.  Reminds me of a computer mouse from the Good Olde Days.

Yeah, we can turn the air conditioners on and off, from anywhere in the world, through an app he MADE me put on my phone.  Ha ha just kidding I love you!  But I’m a little terrified of the technology.

See, they’re set to go on a schedule, so any time I’m sitting alone in my quiet home and SUDDENLY the a/c flips on WAHT TEH F—  it’s just the hyper-intelligent cooling device.  Smug.  Look at you, doing your job.  Jealous?  Maybe I am.  I don’t 100% trust the machines to control the temperature of my little corner of the Skynet (ooooooh Terminators).  We’ve traded control for convenience!  Isn’t this certainly the beginning of the end?

Call me a Luddite, but I don’t know about these networked, app-controlled intelligent machines yet.  I’ll be doing it the old-fashioned way…

The REMOTE CONTROL!  What, you think I’d get up off the couch to press the button?  Come on!  Get with the times!!!

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