Step One: Follow him onto the train like the scent of a pie cooling on a windowsill. Situate yourself where you have a perfect view.
Step Two: Stare. Drool.
Step Three: Silently will them to look up at you. Bore your eyes into the side of their head until your gaze becomes palpable to him and he has no choice but to look up into your eyes.
Step Four: Big. Goofy. Smile.
Step Five: Melt into a puddle of warm happy goo on the floor of the train, which you wish would swallow you up whole when you realize what a total dork he must think you are.
Step Six: Stand a breath’s distance away and carefully avoid eye contact by darting your eyes furtively about the train in an attempt to look casual while keeping his luminescence in your peripheral vision. Sigh casually and stare down at your iPhone, pretending to be deeply engrossed in an email about a throw rug sale to give an excuse to snap a quick photo to gossip over later.
Step Seven: Notice the hint of a faded but colorful sleeve of tattoos peeking out from the sleeve of his hoodie for the first time.
Step Eight: Return to Step Two, repeat Steps Two – Five.
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