This Sunday Stealing is all about ME!! So here’s a picture of me, in case I forget what I look like:
Nice. Anyway! On with the stealing!
I am… ready.
I want… chocolate pretty much all the time.
I have… coffee in the morning and tea at night.
I knew the ending of the story.
I fear… not having time enough to squeeze out of life everything that I want.
I hear… a man singing opera out the window sometimes.
I search… Google when I want to know random things and spend far too long thereafter learning more things and isn’t it wonderful that we have all this knowledge out there, so easy to find, that the only limits are the ones in our own minds?
I wonder… what I’ll think about myself in 10 years.
I regret… not being as outgoing when I was young. I forgive myself, but I wish I could go back and give a shy little girl the reassurance she needed. I think, though, it forced me to learn to develop genuine friendships. So maybe it was all for the best.
I love… sunrises, sunsets, baths by candlelight, wine – all wine! – the smell of dirt in spring, incense and darkly lit rooms, jowly dog smiles, soft things, smelly things, and that tingly clean feeling after washing my face.
I never… remember everything when I leave the house. I’ll forget to put on perfume, or bring that extra banana, or leave my wallet at home (which is not as big a catastrophe as you’d think). A good day is a day when the thing I’ve forgotten is not missed.
I ache… to relive good memories…even if it was just hours ago.
I always… brush my teeth before school because my morning routine is finely honed and scheduled to the minute. I’m really proud that I remember. That’s sad.
I usually… fall asleep without a problem. It’s the waking up in the middle of the night – or just an hour too early – that bothers me. It’s so hard to get back to sleep! But the first time around? No problem.
I am not… a picky eater, I SWEAR. I avoid the gluten because it distresses my insides. And I don’t eat most meats because I don’t like it. So I don’t eat chicken, beef, or pork. Or fowl, or hooved animals. But I eat the crap out of seafood and will demolish escargot if you put cheese on it (CHEESE I tell ya!)
I dance… poorly and often.
I sing… aloud when someone on the train is rapping to their headphones. Yes, people do this. Yes, singing Billy Joel and West Side Story makes me just as big an asshole as they are being. But hopefully they see ME belting out The Beatles and realize how ridiculous they look and learn.
I sometimes… slip and use demeaning language toward other women. As much as I try my best, I sometimes catch myself thinking “Ugh, that bitch!” which is so horrible. Of course, I’m just as mean towards men who, say, take up the entire bench with their leg-spread but the negative language used to demean women is more common and easily tossed around, I think.
I cry… at those Sarah MacLaughlin animal ads on television. Which is proof of my humanity.
I am not always… happy with the way I look. And I let it affect me too much. I would like to be rid of this problem, one way or another.
I lose… my temper when I’m not “in control” of a situation. I’m getting a lot better at this, as in, it’s less of a struggle and letting go comes more naturally. Rarely now do I feel triggered, but that may come from more careful planning.
I am confused… by high-strung people. Why can’t they just chill the fuck out? If I stand behind one more lady at the bank who pointedly and sarcastically snaps “Ex-cuse me!” at someone who mistakenly cuts in line. And always at the bank! News flash: Nobody likes standing in line at the bank. You know what doesn’t help? Waging a duel with the person in front of you over manners. Right?
I need… more money. If I got paid hourly, and not salaried, I’d be making $5 an hour for a 55-hour week. I need my wage to reflect my effort and energy.
I should… wrap up this post and work in something else. Seriously!